Guilt and Your Mental Health: 3 Helpful Tips

Whether it’s from betraying a friend you owe, obstructing justice rather than helping the police, lying to your partner, eating more than your Doctor advises, etc – guilt comes in many ways and can be damaging regardless.

Luckily, it doesn’t have to be quite so damaging, so here are 3 tips for you.

Mindful Reflection

Predictably, understanding the root cause of guilt is what you want to do first, diving deep into the situation, figuring out what’s really going on, and setting the stage for effective problem-solving.

Really throw some questions at yourself about the situation causing guilt. What exactly did you do that’s making you feel this way? Get down to the nitty-gritty. In fact, it’s a good idea to scribble down your thoughts and emotions about the guilt trip; a sort of written therapy session, giving you something tangible to work with and spotting any patterns.

Say you’re feeling guilty about ghosting your wife’s big event. Ask yourself why you pulled a disappearing act. Was it some unexpected chaos, poor planning, or just too many things on your plate?

Constructive Action

Now, the next thing you really want to do is turn guilt into positive action. What does this mean? Well, it really means more than just feeling bad; it’s about doing something concrete to fix the situation and grow as a person.

So yes, if it’s needed, drop a sincere apology to those affected by your actions. Then, figure out how you can make things right and seriously work out a plan to dodge these guilt-inducing situations in the future, whether that means tightening up your time management, communicating better, or setting some reminders.

For example, say you forgot your mother’s birthday and the guilt train just rolled in. You want to own up to your mistake, throw a belated bash, and set up some reminders so that this memory lapse doesn’t become a habit.

Set Boundaries

Unrealistic expectations are one of the easiest ways to set yourself up for guilt trips. Setting boundaries is how you can keep things real and stay sane.

How do you set some boundaries? First, you want to recognize your limits and really make self-care a priority; learning when to hit the brakes and understanding you can’t control every twist and turn. Then,

you want to be very clear about your limits with others. It’s about setting the rules of engagement, helping manage expectations, and keeping guilt at bay.

For example, say unrealistic work demands have you feeling guilty for not meeting expectations. Have a chat with the boss about workload realities, negotiate some doable deadlines, and organize tasks to keep that work-life balance from tipping over.

Often, guilt can and should be taken care of. While some degree of wallowing is inevitable, there’s often no reason to feel guilty forever. Try out these tips.